Nothing is certain in this world, Benjamin Franklin very nearly once said, except death and taxis. And it’s true. Cabs, like the Grim Reaper, are one of the world’s great constants; wherever you go they’re always there -- unless it’s raining.
But times are tough for these ubiquitous people carriers. Spiraling fuel costs are pushing up fares, and pesky governments are intent on driving classic -- if environmentally disastrous -- models off the road.
So before it’s too late, we've taken a look at the world's greatest taxis. This lot don't just turn your A into B, they turn your cash into experiences. All hail.
Got your own great taxi experiences? Let us know below in the comments.
10. Mexico City’s VW Beetles
Herbie's ozone-destroying, chain-smoking twin.
Everyone likes VW Beetles, so we’ve stuck Mexico’s iconic vochos in at number 10. There isn’t much to love about these pollution-belching bugs though.
Not unless you enjoy being squeezed into a tiny seat and -- if you risk an unlicensed cab -- being robbed at knife-point.
In the back: Diminutive Mexican drug lord Joaquín “El Chapo” Guzmán Loera.
Tip factor: If the driver has removed the front passenger seat for extra legroom.
9. Shanghai's VW Jettas
With Shanghai's cabs you need to wipe your feet ... after you get out.
There’s nothing iconic about Shanghai’s humdrum fleet of Volkswagen Jettas and it’s never clear if the Perspex screen around the driver is to keep phlegm in or out.
But to zip in a cab over the city’s elevated neon expressways is to truly experience modern Shanghai: cheap, fast and just a little bit dirty.
In the back: Yao Ming (provided there’s a sun roof he can stick his head out through).
Tip factor: If the driver gets there without mounting the sidewalk.
8. Moscow’s Porsches
If you drive a Porsche for a living you can paint it any color you want, OK?
Most major cities have novelty boats, helicopters or luxury car taxis, but somehow being picked up by a Porsche makes more sense in Moscow where oligarchs have money to burn and are apparently willing to pay a US$95 flag-fall.
Cheaper options are available, but this is Moscow, so not much cheaper.
In the back: Vladimir Putin, a man used to backseat driving.
Tip factor: What the hell, just round it up to the nearest US$100.
7. Hong Kong’s Toyota Crown Comforts
How many damp Hong Kongers can you fit inside a Toyota?
Color-coded in primary reds, greens and blues, Hong Kong’s boxy Toyota Crown Comfort taxis have a reassuring Toy Town feel, with prices to match.
Drivers will go anywhere for a quick dollar, even in a typhoon. They won’t go to the expat enclave of Discovery Bay though, but who can blame them?
In the back: Hong Kong Chief Exec Donald Tsang, with a beady eye on the meter.
Tip factor: If the cab isn’t air-conditioned to below freezing point.
6. Nürburgring’s BMWs
This is the look she gives you right before she becomes an evil demon racing taxi mistress. Prepare to cry.
If Germany’s speed unlimited autobahns aren’t fast enough, you can hire a souped-up BMW taxi to rocket you around the country’s Nürburgring Grand Prix circuit.
You’ll be charged a small fortune for this and you’ll end up almost exactly where you started, but there the similarity to other taxis ends.
In the back: Michael Schumacher, picking up a few tips.
Tip factor: If you manage to keep your lunch down.
5. Bangkok’s tuk-tuks
Onions, check. Giant enormous earbuds to annoy driver, check.
Auto-rickshaws aren’t unique to Bangkok and weren’t invented here, but like smiles, noxious energy drinks and Ping-Pong tricks, Thailand claims them as its own.
Rivalry from safer four-wheel cabs has threatened their trade, but like cockroaches, tuk-tuks would probably survive a nuclear Armageddon.
In the back: Alleged arms dealer Viktor Bout (before his arrest).
Tip factor: If the driver gets you there without detouring to a temple, fake gem store or tailors.